Yesterday morning, we conducted a session on road signs with a small demo setup. As we discussed each road sign, we also asked the kids questions on their life in connection to the sign in front of them. For example, for the child talking about a ‘speed breaker’, we asked him: “Aise 2 incidents bataye jab zindagi mein speed breaker aaye ho.” (share two incidents when you felt that there was a speed breaker in your life); for the ‘No U-Turn’ sign we asked: “Zindagi mein aise kab hua jab aap ko pata chala ki no U-Turn zone mein aap aa gaye hoon. Fir aapne kya kiya?“ (In life, when was there a time when you realized that you have entered a ‘No U-Turn’ Zone? What did you do after that?)
Similarly, we asked the children one question for every sign, and in all about 18 questions. And we got some really intriguing answers. For example, one boy shared that when there were ‘Go Slow’ signs in life, he did not actually slow down and which is why he has made so many mistakes so far. Another kid (Murder Case) shared for the sign of ‘No Parking’, that he needs to learn not to park his car in the company of wrong friends! For ‘Accident Prone Zone’, the reflection was that we get into group fights because of our friends in the area and that is highly prone to life accidents. A profound response was shared by a kid in a funny way: for ‘No Entry’, he did not see the no-entry sign and went right in, because of which he got into an accident and is now at the Children’s Home (he is here on a case of Attempted Murder). These questions and responses got many of them thinking about various situations of life. However, as it generally is at the Dongri Home, the session was chaotic and messy; but within that mess, there were all these stories that emerged.
And then, there was one gem that was hidden but was in store for us after the lunch break! Over the last month, across sessions, we had observed one kid, Roshan, to be quite sharp and reflective. So we decided to call him separately and video record his reflections to all the questions. As we started, he was elaborating on his response to the ‘No Parking’ sign in the morning session, in regards to his friends circle. Soon enough, he started sharing his personal incidents, his childhood and about his case. So, we immediately turned off the video recording and allowed him to flow with his conversation. He went on to share in detail about his entire journey, how he is connected to his family, how he went off track during the Covid Lockdown years which led him to severe addiction, and how he ended up coming to Dongri. Interestingly, he connected these to various road signs at various points.
He shared that he was extremely close to his parents, and had a very friendly relation with them. He is the eldest among 3 siblings. Their village is in Uttar Pradesh but they have stayed in Mumbai from early childhood. His family was not very well off, and his father had taken a loan to build a house back in the village and most of his income would be spent in returning the loan. So from an early age, Roshan realized that his father wasn’t able to buy him things other than the basics and so he started working in small ways to support himself and his family. He was hardworking and also doing decently well in academics. However, when the lockdown hit in 2020 because of Covid 19, at the age of about 13 years (7th STD) he and his family traveled all the way to UP via road in an overpacked tempo. Once he got there, he started making new friends there and would while away his day as they all had a lot of time and nothing much to do. During this time, he started trying out various substances and over time became heavily addicted to some of them. He shared how these were some of the worst days of his life in hindsight. When he got back to Mumbai after two years of covid, he suddenly realized that academically, he had fallen back and was struggling to study again. One day, he and his friends were caught by the police with some substances and taken to the police station. When his parents were informed and they came to the police station, his mother had broken down completely and his father was furious and started beating him. After his mother intervened, his father stopped, and they took him back home. After this incident, he realized that the friendly and open bond that he shared with his parents had been fractured. Despite multiple attempts, he couldn’t bring back the relationship to where it was before. At this point, he decided that he had entered a ‘No U-Turn Zone’ and completely gave up on drugs (except tobacco). He also started putting a lot of effort to catch up on his academics. He somehow managed to pass his 9th STD and after further effort, scored about 60% in his 10th Board Exams. He also started working again.
His life took another turn when he was convinced by his friends to get involved in one of their personal matters, because of which he became a participant in a murder case and was brought to the Dongri Children’s Home. This time however, his parents were supportive and concerned for him. They were giving him confidence and hope.
He paused and reflected on where he is now. He said that he was at a crossroad, at a T junction with two roads in front of him – one where he will change and become a good person and the other where he will continue his bad habits and wrong company. He shared that he wants to go down the positive route now, but is scared that if he doesn’t keep himself occupied with work once he is released, he might get into the company of wrong friends and again end up in a mess. He continued sharing in detail and we just listened on, with some brief conversations in between. It was an extremely profound interaction which led to deep self reflection for him, changed a lot within us, and bloomed a genuine relationship between us and the kid.
Next day evening, I had to take a train to Vadodara and hence we all left early from work. That evening, Sheetal visited her mother and sister and since she had left early, she had time in hand. She asked these questions to her sister and her sister shared powerful responses to them. They had a beautiful conversation around these questions and it felt like they spent meaningful time together after a long time. Next week, we discussed some of these questions with Xavier sir at Dongri, and there were some wonderful stories and powerful discussions that emerged.
The ripples of this session were amazing to witness, yet hard to measure or capture. And it is moments like these that provide a glimpse of our interconnectedness and give a deep sense of satisfaction for the work that we do.
Love Joy Peace
